Rob & Jim are dispatched to contain The Blob, a movie that is criminally under-evangelized compared to its contemporaries, The Thing and The Fly. The boys have a theory as to why, but they spend most of the episode gushing about the INCREDIBLE special effects, the surprisingly nuanced secondary character interactions, and exactly how much poop needs to be added to water before it officially becomes poopwater. The answer will (probably not) surprise you! Plus: we discover the first canonical appearance of Johnny Fiveaces.
Rob & Jim take flight on a magical pegasus to visit My Little Pony: The Movie, a film that vacillates between ‘colorful fun’ and ‘hypercapitalist nightmare’ at the drop of a hat. Topics discussed include the 1980s Hasbro monomyth, when it’s okay to sing in a cartoon baby voice (spoiler: fucking never), and whether or not it’s possible to stop the Smooze. Also: please welcome our special guest, the King of Grundle Land!
Having been found guilty of nondescript space crimes, Rob & Jim are sentenced to watch The Borrower, a movie that must continually swap heads with other movies in order to limp across the 86-minute finish line. Topics of discussion include surface-level readings of John McNaughton’s previous work, when it’s appropriate to use a closeup of a dog (vs. a closeup of a dog puppet), and why movies seem to think the 80s were a crime infested murderpit from hell. Up next: Get ready to meet the Grundle King!
Rob & Jim crash land on the Planet of the Vampires and immediately split into two opposing factions. Hotly debated topics include whether the uniforms are really that goofy, the quiet brilliance of otherwise mundane production choices, and a smattering of Neal Stephenson shade. In the end they kill each other over a packet of astronaut ice cream, and their skeletons are discovered thousands of years later by confused and deeply sexist Italian spacemen. Plus: Ice Cube!
Rob & Jim stall for as long as they can, but are eventually forced to discuss Hey Good Lookin’, a Ralph Bakshi film in all possible respects. A live existential crisis follows. Topics discussed include the arc of Bakshi’s career, how the movie’s dialogue isn’t terrible (except for all the racism), and why it’s sad that Cool World is the “best” Bakshi film. Also: Remember when people thought “Superfly Johnson” was the worst possible name for a black character? Have we got a surprise for you!
Rob & Jim find themselves six feet under with Dead & Buried, and they couldn’t be happier. Topics discussed include the senseless slaughter of classic vehicles, whether or not it’s appropriate to teach children witchcraft, and the perfect casting of Jack “Grandpa Joe” Albertson as a cheery mortician with a dark secret. Plus: we break our pull streak with the jinx to end all jinxes. STAY TUNED!
Rob & Jim fawn over Superstition, a film containing a scene in which Stacy Keach Sr. is telekinetically buzzsawed in half by a three hundred year old ghost witch. Sure, other insane things happen in this movie – surprise hangings, corpsewater pool parties, uncomfortable parental alcoholism – but it’s hard to top. Also: always remember to silence your phone before podcasting, but if you can’t, then at least pick a hilariously vulgar ringtone.